40 Hilarious Ways To Make Sure You Never Become A “Real Adult”
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Deep inside, many of us have never truly become adults. Words like maturity and grown-up don’t mean anything to us, but we have to act that way to be “socially acceptable”. We’re children in an adult world and for the longest time, we felt like we had to hide our true selves.
But trust me, there are more of us than you could ever imagine. And if we all lost some of our irrational inhibitions, the world might look something like this….
Go out in public wearing a costume.
Build the most awesome couch fort ever and hide away from the world
Give your nose a thorough picking (eating the boogers is optional)
Make your dino nuggets fight each other before you viciously devour them
Pull silly pranks on others for no good reason
Make silly faces at the camera with other “adults” when you should be doing “adult things”
Lose all inhibition when you’re hanging out with a friend and there are toys around
Enjoying the timeless adrenaline rush found only in a bounce house (or a trampoline)
After turning off the last light, sprint into the bedroom, slam the door jump into bed and hide under the covers. Because monsters.
And be completely terrified of leaving any body part over the edge of the bed.
Get hangry and eat ice cream for dinner
Or eat whatever you want for breakfast. Because you can.
In fact, just make up your own damn food pyramid.
Be completely immature and resort to toilet humor to make your friends laugh
Go on a spontaneous, epic adventure
Do something completely inappropriate when other people are trying to be “mature”
Be a good samaritan and use The Force to open sliding doors for others
Dive headfirst into a ballpit. Or better yet, build one in your own house
Run up the stairs on all fours like a jaguar
Slide on the hardfloor in socks
NEVER. STEP. ON. CRACKS.
Step on crunchy things like pinecones and leaves and savor the sweet sounds they make
Check behind the shower curtains for monsters and never close your eyes in the shower, even if you’re shampooing
Clearly the face of a man paralyzed with fear.
Laugh when you fart…around other people
Go down playground slides like you’re having the time of your life
Wear footie pajamas all day or better yet, all weekend
Try to balance along the curb when you go for a walk. Sidewalks are for lame people.
Make breath clouds when it’s cold out and pretending like you’re smoking a cigar, or that you’re a steamship
Chug an entire carton of chocolate milk. Seriously, why do we suddenly stop drinking chocolate milk when we hit adulthood?
Play the balloon game where it can’t touch the floor, even if you have to knock over furniture. Get irrationally angry at people who just watch the balloon hit the ground.
Or make everyone at work / your dorm play the “FLOOR IS LAVA” game
Laugh at stupid stuff like this:
Eat the “adult version” of lunchables
Take silly pictures with props
Accept challenges that will most likely involve someone getting injured
Ride on the back of a shopping cart
Pretend like you’re a superhero.
Or just hide in the most random places.
And finally, take a nap whenever you feel like it
Because seriously…adults are weird!
So don’t be afraid and free the spirit buried under all the responsibilities of adulthood. Few people will judge you and if they do, “the hell with them”.
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